An Open Letter to My 2017-Self

December 27, 2017


Dear Abeer,
Before we get all too sappy, I want to congratulate you for making it this far! You actually made it! I know it was never easy. You started the year full of hope, full of life.

You celebrated your anniversary with the love of your life. You had a birthday party surrounded with people you called your friends. It was a really magical night, wasn’t it? You went home to see your family – a month filled with joy and love. It all started too well. Too much happiness that you wished it stayed like that for the rest of the year.

But things went downhill. The wind suddenly changed its course and you found yourself drowning with sadness and insecurities. It became a year of heartbreak and betrayal. Your anxiety has pulled you down again. The world became a darker place and you failed to save yourself. People you loved so much left you and you felt so alone that you never saw the ones who really cared. You spent too much time criticizing yourself that you ignored those who appreciate you. You dismissed the idea that there was still something good in this place because you were hurt. You ignored the help that came your way.

The noose got tighter and you almost gave up. You almost ended it… Almost…

But you didn’t.

And here you are. Here you are at last.

You have come to realize that some days aren’t perfect, there are still struggles, there’s still pain… But you have handled it well. You became a stronger person now more than ever. You mastered the courage to accept the things  you cannot change and let go of people you thought you can’t live without. You became more comfortable in your own skin. You challenged yourself to become bold. I am so proud of you. Of what you have accomplished; of what you have become; and what was left of you. And thank you. Thank you for being here. Thank you for staying alive. Thank you for never giving up on you.

I can’t guarantee you that 2018 will be the best year of your life or that you won’t get hurt along the way, but I can tell you that when the big waves come crushing in, I know that you can sail right through it because 2017 has prepared you well. But more than anything else, I wish that the coming year be your year of freedom. Free from hatred and envy; free from insecurities and self-doubt; free from anger that poisons your heart. Free to chase your dreams and free to become the person you want to be.

And I do hope that when the clock strikes 12 at midnight to start the new year, you can tell yourself:

“Here you are. Here you are at last.”

Always Hopeful,



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Abeer is a part-time muggle, part-time blogger who loves books, films, coffee, photography, good food, vintage stuff, cozy mornings and warm hands. If she's not here, she's probably procastinating.

This is a blog for books & life + style.




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